Anonymous asked: Yes I have a question. Why are you so smeggin attractive?
Hey buddy! Goalpost head had a reply all typed out here, but I decided to do the kind thing and delete it to save him the embarrassment as this question is clearly directed at me!
To answer your question, I don’t know!! I wake up every day wondering the same thing! But there are many questions that have no answer and you just have to accept simple facts.
I am one damn attractive pussy cat.
Anonymous asked: Are you the hologram of Nanobot Rimmer or the hologram of the original Rimmer? Or one of those Ace Rimmers out there?
I’d rather you didn’t mention ‘Ace’ thank you.
(OOC: Ok hey I didn’t want to do any ooc stuff, but this is a good question so I’ll just explain this here!
I didn’t really put too much consideration into what incarnation this Rimmer would be as it’s just for a bit of a laugh really. But considering there isn’t too much to go off of characterization wise with the newer Rimmer in comparison to the original, I think I’ll keep it as the original for now. At least until series X comes around which I can’t wait for honestly!)
Anonymous asked: What inspired you to invent your glorious salute? I think this should be adopted by all Space Corps divisions post-haste! It is a work of sheer brilliance, of course.
Why thank you. It’s good to see someone else appreciates the monumental amount of work I put into that salute! Goodness knows these smeggers I’m lumbered with don’t appreciate it.
As I’ve said before, the original Full Rimmer salute was inspired by, and was meant to symbolise, the five arms of the Space Corps.
I’m still waiting to see if the salute was adopted. Maybe the next post pod will have the letter.
Also, seeing the sheer amount of interest that my salute has, I’m now constructing a guide to how to perform each salute! Of course the extra long salute for people of special importance will take some time you understand.
Anonymous asked: Who is your best friend on the ship?
Anonymous asked: ARE YOU REALLY A FISH?
Oh tee hee hoddle ha.
Honestly, you make one small mistake on an exam and you never hear the end of it.
It wasn’t even a proper mistake really, just a minute slip of the pen. Some people blow things completely out of proportion.
hardheadedme asked: Will you be my boyfriend? I'll bake you a pie. :D
I know what this is. Don’t think you can fool old Arnold J Rimmer.
The last time I got something like this sent to me was a pink letter which was addressed, “To Arnold Sexy Pecs”.
And it just so happened that it was sent from some snotty First Technician smegger as a joke on Valentine’s Day.
So, right, I was fooled once, but it could have happened to anyone! I won’t be fooled twice, matey.
Anonymous asked: He's Arnold, Arnold, Arnold, Rimmer, without him life would be much grimmer...
How right you are! How on earth would the crew get on without Arnold J. Rimmer?
You complete goit!
I didn’t yer wus such a gud dancer, Rimmah. I’m glad so many people enjoyed i’.
Ah, Listy, Listy, Listy. How little you know. I’m very familiar with lots of dancing styles. The Samba. The Charleston. The Waltz. The Viennese Waltz. The Liverpudlian Limbo.
If it wasn’t for the unfortunate fact that I take the occasional spasm in my right leg, I’d be a very accomplished dancer.
And don’t be smart, they enjoyed laughing at my expense you gimboid. Stop using up Holly’s run time for such puerile animations.
Stop bein’ such a smeg’ead, Rimmah. So people laughed, what’s wrong wit’ ‘aving a good laugh?
An’ ‘olly uses more runtime on you than ‘e does on my ‘obbies. Besides, I’m bored.
phoneboxangels asked: What inspired you to create the genius salute?
Ah, marvelous question!
The Full-Rimmer salute includes five twirls of the hand which is to symbolise the five arms of the Space Corps. Pretty genius if I do say so myself (and I do).
Then there’s the Double-Rimmer for dress occasions.
Not to mention the Half-Rimmer where there isn’t enough time for the Full Rimmer.
And the especially long salute which I reserve for people of importance.
I, of course, sent a letter off to the Ministry about my genius salute and that it should be used instead of the boring old one.
Still waiting for a reply about that. Three million years is a bit of a long wait, but we’re talking about Royal Mail here. Anything could have happened to it.
tumblrbot asked: WHAT IS YOUR EARLIEST HUMAN MEMORY?
Kryten, I don’t need these pity asks, get back to unclogging the bog.
